Relationship

He/She Smashed the Homies…

Urban dictionary “correct definition” is:
When a person in a relationship (open or exclusive) finds out their partner has slept (had sex) with their friend/associate, prior to the relationship’s existence.

You meet someone, y’all vibe, connect and expand on another level, just to find out somebody had a piece of the pie you want to fully consume?! It happens so much, and I did remember briefly “For the Love of Ray J”, the beginning of this “Smash the Homie” pandemonium. He had two instances where two women slept with one of his close friends. .Reality is, there is too much time in the world to build towards getting over who your lover smashed. Why be worried about what happened before you “clocked” your time in with your boo. That’s all it is…a PRIOR technicality, or “foul” in the game of life.It doesn’t mean it’s completely over, it is a small hiccup that requirea you be a grown individual. “IT” happens, get over yourself. If you’re not the Virgin Mary herself, you’re bound to sleep with someone or be with someone through an extension of someone you know, knew or heard of! Real T.

I’m not saying to partake in a big orgy fest and expect it and accept it, but it’s probably common that it’s occurred at least once in a lifetime. Getting to know people and dating are not on my tasks of easy to do’s, but it can be done if there is, men probably handle this better than women. Majority of women tend not to judge you on your past. We trust in our ability to enhance a man through a relationship, or “Upgrade U”. That basically means you don’t need anybody or anything further (she accepted your “smash the homie” and is holding you down, what more do you need?). Most men more than likely will test women until they get to a point where they can trust her, especially if she was the homie smasher.

I don’t believe that who you slept with before who you fell in love with will determine if your relationship will last.You have no control over who you meet and sleep with, and if anybody is at fault, it would be coincidence. I don’t like the idea of conforming to society for their idea of happiness. Live your life… and if you can’t, check out my previous post it gives you insight on how to worry about you.

“GET YO LIFE BOO, GET YO LIFE” https://realbdotcom.wordpress.com/2012/05/03/get-yo-life-boo-get-yo-life/

Signin off XoXo RealBdotcom

Seek & U Shall Find (“Snoopy”)

Getting in my Mojo for the day, and I #Google the interview from Love & Hip Hop’s Chrissy Lampkin squashing infidelity rumors about rapper beau Jim Jones. http://www.realitytea.com/tag/chrissy-lampkin/ I truly respect her standpoint of being a woman who is well kept, and trusting her man to keep her house a happy home leaving all the TRASH outside of the door.

Playing “Snoop Doggy Dog” looking through texts and social network seems like it’s a growing epidemic for some partners.I assume your intuition played a part. It’s like a battle between your heart and its emotions VS. your mind (voice of logic and reason). I have to admit though, finding what you DON’T want should only prompt you to figure out what you DESERVE. I can be a #REALB enough to admit I’ve done it! Suspicions felt, justified me snooping, but eh…Once I found what I didn’t want, I bet I didn’t have to do it again.

I asked one of my respected male friends about the topic. Of course that’s a no go, according to him! It’s like taking a piece of a man’s manhood and by the facial expressions expressed after I posed the question, he stated that maybe previous relationship pattern history and trust issues would be a reason for justifying the act of snooping. Suspicions should be shot down by asking for the truth and receiving the truth. If entertaining dishonesty, realize that you’re still being lied to; which follows through with pursuit of the snoop effect—(now you’re looking alll crazy!)

Confrontation should occur if you have taken the liberty to snoop. When I’ve played my role of “Snoop Doggy Dog” I had to basically decide how I wanted to deal with it. State the issue at hand so there is no confusion(this is what I know, this is what I saw, this is what I want to know). I have had the whole “insecure” word thrown out afterwards, but reality is that insecurity would be based off of infidelity. (it doesn’t have to be physical, it can be emotional as well). If it turned to a denial, I left. #KNOWYOURWORTH

If it’s worth repairing, by all means do it…if it’s not KEEP IT MOVIN.

Signin off XoXo RealBdotcom